📡 The Modern Landscape of Love
From alternative relationships to AI dating, exploring how romance is being redefined
February 14th might be marked on most calendars as Valentine’s Day, but Brazil celebrates "Dia dos Namorados" in June, just before Saint Anthony's Day, deviating from the global Valentine's norm due to its proximity to Carnival.
The tradition includes unique rituals like flipping Saint Anthony’s statue upside down to find their soulmate—a playful nod to tradition as they chase modern love, mixing humour with hope and devotion.
This prompted me to explore the insights from Archrival’s recent study on Gen Z’s romantic inclinations, and gather other relevant materials on the theme. Let's look into the evolving landscape of relationships, shall we?
Thought starters
These thought starters provide a glimpse into how modern romance is being reshaped.
→ Alternative relationships are on the rise, with the growing popularity of "situationships," throuples, and ethical non-monogamy. ENM relationships are becoming more accepted, and searches for ethical non-monogamy have grown 71% in a year, according to Glimpse. The film Challengers has also sparked interest in these diverse models, with Canvas8 reporting a surge in openness to such arrangements.
→ A growing reliance on technology - especially AI - to navigate the complexities of modern romance is evident, with searches for AI dating apps growing 314% since last year, according to Glimpse. Bumble now has AI personas that can go on dates for you, much like a "Black Mirror" episode. AI matchmakers and "Rizz Assistants" are also changing dating by offering personalised matchmaking and advice. However, this tech raises ethical concerns, like where to draw the line between enhancing your appearance and actively lying about how you look with the use of AI-generated photos.
→ This tweet got me thinking about how real and common parasocial relationships have become. These one-sided connections people form with celebrities or fictional characters make these fans feel like they really know them. Thanks to social media, we get a closer look at the lives of public figures, making these connections feel personal and common. It's interesting to see how digital interactions can create a sense of closeness, even without real-life interaction.
→ New archetypes of masculinity are thriving. From himbos to daddies to bisexual heartthrobs, mainstream ideals of masculinity are evolving to something else. The 'Soft Boy Craze’, a new aesthetic nurtured by K-Dramas, that even get some women to travel to South Korea to find boyfriends, shows how media is reshaping male attractiveness and the global appeal of these new archetypes. The trend continues with a new favourite heartthrob - the 'Cinnamon Roll Man', emphasising a shift towards more gentle and approachable male figures. Also, the buzz around Jeremy Allen White and the discussions sparked by the ‘Rodent Man’ recent reports further confirm the changing landscape of masculinity.
The new Gen Z landscape of love, by Archrival
The study reveal a generation that holds complex, seemingly contradictory views on love
→ 67% of Gen Z, and 80% of LGBTQIA+ youth, report a lack of representation in romantic portrayals in media, suggesting a disconnect between real experiences and those depicted in traditional and new media. More than half of Zs (54%) agreed that “rom-coms need to be entirely reinvented to reflect the way Gen Zs date”.
→ Despite their progressive reputation, most still prefer monogamy, despite embracing a more open-minded dating culture: 80% of Gen Z prioritises monogamy over other forms of relationships.
→ A significant 73% value traditional relationship milestones—think dating, engagement, marriage. 69% of Z's said they find it more appealing to be 'dating to marry' rather than 'dating with no expectations' (31%).
Tech is more like a digital wingman, guiding them through the complexities of modern relationships and helping share their stories.
→ Platforms like TikTok and Instagram are used not only for connection but as vital sources of advice and communal storytelling in their romantic lives. Zs said their top sources for dating and relationship advice over the last 12 months were TikTok (42%), Instagram (36%), and YouTube (30%) — and Gen Z women were twice as likely as their male counterparts to seek dating advice from podcasts.
→ While dating apps are prevalent, 53% of Gen Z describes them as a "necessary evil," showing a preference for more organic interactions possibly facilitated by other digital means.
→ 68% of Gen Zs said they have followed a love story on social media (e.g. Instagram, TikTok), and more than half of Zs (54%) agreed that “rom-coms need to be entirely reinvented to reflect the way Gen Zs date. Maybe what catches is the storytelling, I talked about the ‘Who TF did I marry?’ TikTok series and 'Neighbor saga' in a recent post referring to the ‘Life in Narrative’ code from Vice's Guide to Culture.
→ When asked to make predictions about the relationship landscape in the year 2050, 35% of Zs said they believe it will be common to have an A.I. girlfriend or boyfriend via a virtual companion app, while nearly a third said it will be common to have sex with robots.
→ The study also highlights economic pressures—71% struggle with the cost of dating, and 32% have ended relationships due to financial stress. Furthermore, 63% of Gen Z men feel they aren’t in a financial position to have a serious relationship, a sentiment shared by 45% of women.
→ Limited privacy at home due to living situations affects the quality and development of intimate relationships: 61% lack a private space for intimacy due to living with roommates or parents, exacerbating challenges in developing personal relationships, and maybe explaining why this generation is known as having less sex than the others.
→ There’s a gender disparity in dating dynamics within Gen Z, with 49% of women in relationships compared to just 24% of men, pointing to different experiences and expectations between genders.
Even though Gen Z women are more likely to identify as lesbian or bisexual and may be in same-sex relationships, statistically-speaking this doesn’t explain the gap between single-identifying men and women.
→ 85% of Gen Z women believe that their generation is more commitment-phobic than previous gens.
→ It's important to have things in common, but politics isn't a must. Nearly two-thirds said a potential romantic partner with a different political affiliation than their own is a beige flag — e.g. it’s neither alarming nor alluring.
To sort through the chaos of modern dating, some taxonomically minded singles apply a colour-coded system to potential partners. Red flags are behaviours to avoid (deceit, poor dental hygiene). Green flags are go-ahead signs (honesty, owning floss).
So what is a beige flag? According to the TikTok users who have latched on to the term in the past month, a beige flag is an odd trait in a romantic prospect that is not quite a deal breaker, but not exactly a plus, either.
Enable 3rd party cookies or use another browser
→ According to the study, more than half of Zs (54%) are open to dating someone across the political aisle. And 77% said having a compatible lifestyle with a potential romantic partner is more important than having similar political beliefs. A new study by Tinder highlights that 1 in 5 young people think political apathy is a dating dealbreaker.